When Someone Wrongs You
"Where two or three gather"
Two things you can tap
- A verse number shows the Bible’s exact words.
- An underlined word shows what it means.
Story
What happened?
Tap a verse number, like , to read the Bible’s exact words.
The whole story, in shortWhat happens, start to finish. Open it if you want the ending first.
Jesus told his disciples that if a fellow believer sins against them, they should go and talk to that person privately, hoping to win them back. If that doesn't work, they should bring one or two others along, and then tell the church. He said that what they bind or loose on earth will be bound or loosed in heaven, and promised, "Where two or three gather together in My name, there am I with them."
Where it is in the Bible: Matthew 18:15-20
Who’s who and what came beforePeople, places, and the story so far. Open it anytime.
Scene Card
Cast
- Jesus: The one the Gospels present as the promised Messiah and the Son of God.
- The disciples: Jesus's closest followers.
Setting
- A house in Capernaum, a town in Galilee.
When
- About 2,000 years ago, a little while before Jesus went to Jerusalem.
Before the Story
The disciples had asked who was the greatest. Jesus put a little child in the middle of them (18:1-2).
Jesus told a parable about a lost sheep. A shepherd leaves ninety-nine sheep to find one that wandered away. God doesn't want any of his little ones to be lost (18:12-14).
Here's what comes next: Peter will ask how many times he has to forgive. Jesus will say, "Seventy-seven times" (18:21-22).
Map of the Story
| Scene | Verses | What happens |
|---|---|---|
| 1. Just the two of you | 18:15 | Go and talk to the person privately |
| 2. One or two others | 18:16-17 | If that doesn't work, bring help |
| 3. Bound and loosed | 18:18-19 | God backs up what his people do together |
| 4. Two or three | 18:20 | Jesus is with them |
Plain Retelling
Scene 1 of 4Just the Two of You
Jesus told his disciples what to do when someone does wrong to them.
"If your brother sins against you, go and confront him privately. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over" (18:15).
"Brother" means a fellow believer, someone in God's family.
The goal isn't to win the argument. It is to win the person back.
Scene 2 of 4One or Two Others
Sometimes the person won't listen.
Then, Jesus said, take one or two others along. They can help both people hear each other, and be fair.
If he still won't listen, tell the church.
If he won't listen even to the church, treat him like someone outside God's family.
Jesus said "as you would a pagan or a tax collector" (18:17). That sounds harsh. But remember how Jesus treated tax collectors. He ate with them and invited them to follow him.
Scene 3 of 4Bound and Loosed
"Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (18:18).
To loose means to set free. When God's people forgive someone in Jesus's name, God forgives too.
Jesus also said that when two of his followers agree in prayer, his Father hears them.
Scene 4 of 4Two or Three
Then Jesus made a promise.
"For where two or three gather together in My name, there am I with them" (18:20).
Jesus doesn't need a big crowd. Even two or three people who gather in his name have him right there with them.
Meaning
What does it mean?
Read It
What Does This Mean?
| The text says | It means |
|---|---|
| "Go and confront him privately" (18:15) | Talk to the person first, not about them to everyone else. |
| "You have won your brother over" (18:15) | The goal is a friendship made right again. |
| "Take one or two others along" (18:16) | Get help from wise people if it doesn't work. |
| "Tell it to the church" (18:17) | God's people care when there is a broken friendship. |
| "Whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (18:18) | When the church forgives in Jesus's name, it counts in heaven. |
| "There am I with them" (18:20) | Jesus is present when even a few gather in his name. |
Back Then
"Two or three witnesses" comes from God's law. It was a rule for fairness in a court (Deuteronomy 19:15).
Tax collectors were outsiders. They worked for Rome and often cheated people. Matthew, who wrote this Gospel, was a tax collector before he followed Jesus (9:9).
"Church" here means God's gathered people. It is the Greek word ekklesia, an assembly.
Literal Reader Alert
What if someone is hurting me? Do I have to go talk to them alone? No. Jesus is talking about ordinary wrongs between friends. If someone is hurting you, or you don't feel safe, don't go alone. Tell a trusted adult right away.
Does this mean I should point out everyone's faults? No. Jesus is talking about when someone wrongs you. And right before this, he talked about a shepherd looking for a lost sheep. The goal is always to bring someone back.
Does God do whatever two people agree to pray for? God hears every prayer of his people. That doesn't make prayer a magic trick. Jesus is talking about his followers agreeing together, in his name.
How People Feel
| Who | Feeling | Why |
|---|---|---|
| The one who was wronged | Hurt | Someone sinned against them (18:15) |
| The one who did wrong | Ashamed | Someone came to talk to them about it (18:15) |
| Both | Glad | A friend was won back (18:15) |
For you
What does it mean for me?
Your Turn
Is there someone you need to make things right with? Tap one.
Yes
Jesus says go to them, quietly. Pray first. He goes with you.
I wronged someone
You can be the one who goes first. Saying sorry is brave.
It's not safe
Then don't go alone. Tell a trusted adult. Jesus wants you safe.
Not right now
That's good. Remember Jesus's promise: where two or three gather, he is there.
You Might Have Heard
"If someone hurts you, just cut them off."
What's true: Sometimes you need distance from someone, especially if they are hurting you.
What the story is mainly about: Jesus's first step isn't to cut people off. It is to go to them, privately, to win them back. The goal is forgiveness and a friendship made right.
Where Jesus is: With even two or three people who gather in his name.
Good News
Jesus is the shepherd who goes looking for the lost sheep. He teaches his people to do the same.
"For where two or three gather together in My name, there am I with them" (18:20).
When we hurt each other, Jesus gives us a way back. And he promises to be with us, even when there are only a few.
Jesus wants broken friendships made right. And wherever two or three gather in his name, he is with them.
Big Idea
When someone wrongs you, go to them and try to win them back. Wherever two or three gather in Jesus's name, he is with them.
If this story brings up big feelings, talk with someone you trust, like a parent, pastor, or counselor.
For leaders and parentsLuther, church readings, and notes for teaching.
From Luther
In the Small Catechism, Luther wrote about the "Office of the Keys." It is the authority Jesus gave his church to forgive sins in his name. Luther pointed to Jesus's words about binding and loosing.
In Church
Many churches follow the Revised Common Lectionary. In Year A, it reads Matthew 18:15-20 in early September (Lectionary 23).
We quote Luther for what he got right about grace. He also wrote terrible things about Jewish people. Read our note on that.
Memorize
How do I keep it?
One line from this story to learn by heart. Practice a little now. It will come back later so it sticks.
For where two or three gather together in My name, there am I with them.
How did that feel?
You finished When Someone Wrongs You.
Using this at church
Read in church on
- Lectionary 23 Year AGospel, Matthew 18:15–20
For a newsletter or sermon notes
When Someone Wrongs You, explained in plain words. Jesus says what to do when a friend wrongs you, and promises to be with even two or three. About 8 minutes. https://freescripture.org/stories/when-someone-wrongs-you/
Lines for the next eight Sundays, on Digital Lutheran Church